The Happiness Project

Happiness…what does it mean?

It's interesting…I looked up the definition online, and I chuckled when I read that it meant, "the state of being happy." Yup - that certainly explains it, huh??!!


Which does beg the question, though…what makes you happy?


I've been doing a lot of thinking about this lately…most likely due to my feelings of sadness that have shadowed me since losing my father last month. I've felt burdened by tears and grief, and believing that my life was void of happiness. Sometimes, when faced with overwhelming grief or joylessness, it can be hard to find the small moments in life that make us happy…it's as if we can't be happy unless something huge or major comes along that surrounds us with glee and delight…and that's not a good thing.

We sometimes need to be reminded to find the happiness in the small things.


I needed a good kick in the butt reminder of this, and so I'm grateful to a friend, Kathi, who challenged me to find three things a day that bring happiness…no matter how big, no matter how small. And, of course, being the competitive person that I am, I will ALWAYS rise up to a challenge (or a dare, but we won't go there!), and so yesterday, I deliberately and determinedly looked for those small things that made me smile.

And boy - was I surprised by the results.

I didn't find just THREEE things yesterday…oh, no.

The day ended up being full of moments that brought a smile to my face…a warmth to my heart…pleasure to my soul.


The day began with a bowl of warm potato soup for breakfast:




Yes. I said potato soup for breakfast.

DO NOT JUDGE ME on my breakfast choice!!!

I had made a HUGE batch of homemade potato soup on Saturday, deliberately making extra so we'd have leftovers. And on Sunday morning, a nice, warm bowl of potato soup - with some cheese and bacon on top - sounded perfect for breakfast.

And it was. Nom. Nom. Nom.

Happy, happy, happy.


After breakfast, I said a quick goodbye to Hubby and Daughter, and then headed to a Ladies Holiday Brunch and Ornament Exchange. For three hours, I giggled, laughed, drank delicious mimosas, and played a cutthroat game of Swipe the Ornament with some delightful and super-fun women:



Okay, so we don't look like we're having much fun in this picture, but BLAME THE PHOTOGRAPHER (me!), because this is so not representative of the laughter - to the point of tears - that ensued later! I think we were actually listening to our hostess go over the rules of the game here…which is why we're all looking a bit serious. Stealing ornaments from someone else is definitely serious business, for sure.

I was also tickled because I was sitting next to THIS girl, Suzie, one of my BFF's - going all the way back to high school:



Suzie can always make me laugh and bring me out of a funk, which is a good thing…girlfriends are definitely good for the soul.


When it was my turn to play, I made a beeline for THIS set of ornaments and stole them from another lady:



I really, really, really liked these - as I decorate one of the rooms in my house with a woodsy theme, highlighted with bronze ornaments…these would go PERFECT in my house!! I did feel a tad guilty about swiping these beauties from the other lady, but I was assured it was all part of the game. My happiness in having scored the perfect ornaments overshadowed the guilt, though, so after a heartfelt apology to the original owner, I left the party very, very happy.


Hubby and I then headed down to the Kauffman Center to catch the matinee performance of Mannheim Steamroller:




The Kauffman Center is truly a gem here in Kansas City, and I'm always impressed at the beauty of the venue:



Pictures do NOT do it justice, as it will blow your mind pretty much every time you visit.

Before the show, I took a selfie of Hubby and I:



I'm a lucky girl, so this guy always makes me happy. I think the lady behind me doesn't look too happy, though - maybe she's sleeping…or most likely, checking her phone. Let's hope.


So, the concert was pretty amazing…I love the music of Mannheim Steamroller…so soothing, so relaxing, and so cool to watch them perform it live with the entire orchestra on stage. One song, though, had me in tears - Auld Lange Syne. Gah. I couldn't help but think of my Dad, and so I shed a few.


After the concert, it was going on 6:00 pm - and dinner was now in store. Hubby took me to one of my favorite restaurants, the Grand Street Cafe. And there, I was thrilled to discover they had a gluten-free pasta now on the menu:



This was a buckwheat farfalle "Mac & Cheese" dish - made with sun gold tomato, olive oil, fried kale, fontina cheese, pecorino & romano cheese, and smokehouse bacon.

EEP.

It was delicious. And gluten-free, to boot!!!

WIN-WIN!!!!!!!


And truly one of the best parts of the day were the pants that I was wearing:



I splurged on these Antonio Melani wool pants two years ago - after falling in love with the beautiful pattern & bronze/gold ribbon running through them - but I was a little too thick-in-the-middle to wear them.

UNTIL NOW!!!!

This running has definitely paid off, as I managed to fit into these pants all day yesterday with ROOM TO SPARE!!!!

Woot. Woot.

Happy, happy, happy - that was me!!!!


Strangely enough, I had a very, very vivid dream last night - about my Dad…and in my dream, my Dad was admonishing me for being gloomy and sad…telling me I needed to get on with life and enjoy the moments…coincidence???


Peace.

Reassurance That I'm Not Dead

So, this is REALLY going to date myself, but anyone remember the (most awesome) movie, "Fiddler on the Roof"?

A song in that movie keeps going round and round in my head…"Sunrise, Sunset", which can really drive one INSANE, as well as others around you, if you just so happen to constantly HUM LOUDLY AND OFF-KEY said tune…I may or may not be that annoying person, but anyway, I digress.

So that I can get that song stuck in YOUR head, as well (you're welcome), here's the particular stanza that is stuck, STUCK, in my head:

"Sunrise, sunset
Sunrise, sunset
Swiftly flow the days…"

This is because my days, for the most part, have been swiftly flowing by…to the point that it's been almost a month, a MONTH, GAH, since I've posted on my blog.

I know.

You all missed me.

But…as Jack Nicholson famously said in another (most awesome) movie, "The Shining", "I'm back."

Woot woot.

So…from sunrise to sunset, my days have been filled with the minutiae of every-day life…besides unwinding from the holidays, I've been spending time doing such blog-worthy things (NOT!) as reading books, watching old movies, cooking up new creations, hooking up with old friends, cheering on my favorite football teams (to no avail), and hanging with my fabulous family.

Speaking of cooking…at the pushing of my doctor, I visited with a dietician last week, so I could gain confidence and creativity on my gluten-free journey. Sad to say, she DIDN'T suggest substituting chocolate (or wine) for bread and pasta, but she DID have some great suggestions for new recipes. With her support and guidance, I set a goal of trying two new gluten-free recipes per week, until my confidence in the kitchen, and my family's confidence in ME, grows.

Today, I've attempted an Italian Polenta Mozzarella Bake…which is not only gluten-free, but also healthy in general. (As my dietician said, I have to be careful to NOT assume that a "gluten-free diet" automatically assumes it's a healthy diet, as some people do. One must still be careful and selective in what to eat, and make healthy choices. Chocolate and wine in moderation, she said. Of course, her idea of "moderation" and my idea of "moderation" may be slightly different.)


Doesn't it look YUMMY??!!!


I spent about an hour with the dietician, discussing my breakfasts, lunches, dinners, and snacks…as well as my beverages. I was relieved to know that for the most part, I'm doing things "right." Which is good, because if I do things wrong, I pretty much WANT TO DIE BY BEING STABBED BY A THOUSAND NEEDLES because that's pretty much less painful than a gluten attack.

Anywho.

I'm alive. I'm well. Life is good. Reading some good books, watching some good movies, and dining on some pretty tasty creations, all while dishing with some fabulous friends and family.
It doesn't get much better.

Peace.

Poison Myself?? Is My Doctor CRAZY??!!

Here's a question:

If your doctor tells you that he wants you to eat rat poison - for the next fourteen days - in order to get some lab tests done…

…would you do it???


This is the dilemma that I face this morning. Oh, not that my doctor has ordered me to eat RAT POISON - gah. But he might as well have, as he wants me to put gluten back in my diet for the next two weeks, in order to definitively conclude whether I have Celiac Disease or Crohn's Disease.

When I eat something that contains gluten, it might as well be rat poison…my stomach will cramp relentlessly for twelve hours, which is pretty much debilitating. Besides racked with excruciating pain, I'll experience nausea, fatigue, and frequent trips to the restroom, if you get my drift. My head will feel like it's exploding, and my hands and feet will tingle and go numb.

Fun times, I'm tellin' ya.

Not.

It's bad enough when I accidentally "poison" myself with gluten - but to do it deliberately??? Who DOES that?

Apparently, ME, if I decide to do what the doctor has requested.

He tried to make it sound attractive, by telling me to do it around Thanksgiving, so I could "enjoy" my traditional Thanksgiving dinner, with it's gravy, rolls and stuffing - all heavily loaded with gluten. But…knowing the consequences…it's not tempting. Not tempting at all.

I still haven't decided yet. It's tough.

It doesn't help matters any that Hubby is absolutely, unequivocally against me putting gluten back in my diet…as he's had to live with me when I'm having an attack. And it's not pretty.

Do I NEED to have the diagnosis? The doctor says I do…but what would it matter? In the long run? Wouldn't the treatment - so to speak - still be the same? Avoid gluten?

What would YOU do???

Peace.

The Bristol: Review

It's no secret that I love food.

And so, this new adventure of gluten-free (GF) dining has been quite the learning experience...I've had some good days, and some not-so-good days, for sure. I've been learning to not only read labels of pretty much every single item I consider eating, but I've also learned that, while dining out, it is up to ME to be my best advocate on what I can - or can't - have. If I leave it up to my server, I'm probably doomed...and unfortunately, I've learned this the hard way, when I've been "glutenized" - and left reeling with pain after a meal.

Gah.

Eating in my own kitchen has been certainly easier than dining out, as I know EXACTLY what ingredients are going into my cuisine. It's when I go out to eat that I stumble...and so, I've been on a quest to learn as much as I can about local restaurants here in town and their gluten-free offerings. Honestly, although more venues are getting on board with a GF menu, there's still a lack of info out there for the average diner.

I've always posted dining reviews here on my blog, and I will continue to do so - with a twist. From here on out, my dining reviews will concentrate on GF options...as I have to believe that there are others who are just like me....

Last night, Hubby and I headed to the Power and Light District in downtown Kansas City - a collection of diverse dining and entertainment venues that draws people of all ages from all over our area. We had 8:00 pm tickets for the Eagles concert, and I scored a 6:00 pm dinner reservation at The Bristol, an upscale seafood & steak restaurant that has been in business here in town for over thirty years.



I had checked out their website BEFORE we arrived at the restaurant, as I wanted to see if they had a dedicated gluten-free (GF) menu. I was thrilled to see that they did, indeed - and it didn't look extremely limited - unlike some restaurants I've dined at. There were a variety of appetizers, entrees and desserts that would be "safe" for me to indulge in.

Hubby and I arrived at exactly 6:00 pm, and were immediately seated. The restaurant was absolutely packed, as it's only two blocks from the concert venue, and apparently, all 15,000+ concert-goers had the same idea: grab a bite to eat before the show. Even with the craziness of a full house, with hundreds of others clamoring to get in at the front desk, our server was calm, cool and collected. She quickly brought the GF menu for me, as well as the "regular" menu for Hubby. This picture of the GF menu is pretty poor, but it gives you a good idea of what they offer - and indeed, it was pretty extensive, considering it is GF:




We began our meal with some delicious cocktails: a chocolate martini for me, and a Margarita martini for Hubby:



The lighting was VERY low in the restaurant, so you'll have to excuse my crappy pictures.

Oh my goodness, this drink was good! Not too sweet - but strong enough that I had a good buzz going...squeeeeeee!!!!!! I am SO vivacious and funny when I have a buzz going...per me.

For a starter, I had the mixed greens salad:



This was a mixture of watercress greens, feta cheese, and pine nuts...topped with a delicious honey balsamic vinaigrette dressing. Going GF has pretty much insured that I will always have to have some sort of a vinaigrette dressing, and I found this dressing to be just the right mixture of sweet with tart.


For my entree, I ordered the filet mignon, with sides of mashed potatoes, as well as an artichoke:



The filet initially was a little too "pink" for me, but our server was very quick to take it back to the kitchen and have it cooked to my taste. It was tender, juicy, and flavorful - especially when dipped into that little bowl of mystery sauce (I believe it was honey mustard with a hint of horseradish). Nom nom nom. The mashed potatoes were to die for, and the artichoke was...there. I should have realized it would be swimming in butter, and when one does not have a gallbladder, butter is a four-letter word.


Upon the recommendation of our server, Hubby ordered the Barramundi, a white fish from New Zealand, along with some Butternut Squash Risotto:



He loved the fish, but found the risotto to be a little on the dry side...which is pretty typical for risotto offered in restaurants, we've found.


We skipped dessert, as I pretty much had cleaned my plate and was enjoying my chocolate martini - still. We also needed to get our butts in gear and walk across the street to the concert - it was going to be starting soon, and I didn't want to miss a MINUTE!

All in all, I give 5 stars to The Bristol. The service was prompt, courteous and attentive...and the food was delicious. It was also nice to have a bit of a choice while dining GF, as so many restaurants offer perhaps two entrees, at most, to choose from. Gah. We will definitely be going back to this little gem!

Mourning My Losses

Pity the fool who gets between a half-starved woman and her twice-baked potato.

That's a saying, right?

Well. If it's not...then it SHOULD be.


Let's backtrack for a moment, shall we?

Friday night, we celebrated a son's birthday by heading to a local restaurant here in town, The Hereford House. Now - the Hereford House is a steak house that has been in operation in Kansas City since steak was pretty much invented. As in, forever. We don't go often, due to the sticker shock we see while perusing a menu, but the dozen or so times we've gone, it has been an absolute FAVORITE of mine.

I always, always, always begin with the house salad - not that the salad itself is spectacular, but the restaurant has the most amazing salad dressings, literally called the "Yellow" and the "Pink" - and when blended together, create absolute perfection on a bed of lettuce. This mixture is so divine, that I have always, always saved my delicious bread roll just so I can pinch little pieces and then dip in the remaining pink & yellow mixture...squee!

For my entree, I've always, always ordered the bacon-wrapped medallions of beef...they're usually succulent, moist and tender, and drenched in a demiglaze sauce that is to die for. With this, I pair a twice-baked potato that is dripping in butter, sour cream and bacon. Bliss.

For dessert, they have a white chocolate bread pudding, that soaked in rum sauce and torched with a match, melts in my mouth and leaves me perfectly sated.

This is my normal dining experience at The Hereford House.

But...this particular Friday not was not normal. Nope. My NEW normal is Gluten-Free...and this changed everything.

Arriving at the restaurant at 7:00 pm for our reservations, we wait patiently for everyone to show up - there were ten of us in all, celebrating. Once seated, Hubby quickly ordered some appetizers for everyone, and not ONCE did he even consider if it was something that I could eat. So, as trays of stuffed mushrooms and spinach artichoke dip were passed around the table, I shot DEVIL EYES in Hubby's direction, as the waiter apologetically told me none of these particular appetizers were "safe."

Soon, it was 8:00 pm, and we hadn't received our salads yet. I was starving. STARVING, I tell you. To the point that I was about ready to gnaw off my hand and take up cannibalism.

At 8:15, our salads arrived. However, the "Pink" and the "Yellow" are not gluten-free...so I was reduced to a vinaigrette dressing, that tasted pretty much like PURE vinegar. Blah. Gah. It was AWFUL. As hungry as I was, I only managed to choke down about 2 pieces of acidic lettuce before giving up and waiting impatiently for my entree.

Soon, my medallions arrived...with no sauce. Just some dry pieces of leather sitting on my plate. And no divine twice-baked potato, either - as it is not considered "safe", either. Instead, I was given some steamed vegetables.

Bleh.

For dessert, others enjoyed cheesecake and creme brûlée...while I had...nothing. Oh, I COULD have enjoyed some ice cream, but by this point, I was pretty much beyond dessert.

I WAS MAD AS HELL AND I WANTED EVERYONE TO KNOW IT.

Yes. I was mad. I was mad at my circumstances. I was mad that I can't eat what I used to eat. I was mad at the restaurant for not even attempting to serve to the Celiac population. I was mad at Hubby - well - just because. I needed to blame SOMEONE, and he was convenient.

I WAS HAVING A MAJOR-ASS PITY PARTY, AND BIRTHDAY PARTY BE DAMNED.

It SUCKS sometimes having this condition.

So...on the way home, I pretty much blew up at Hubby - it was HIS fault, I decided, for EVERYTHING. Poor Hubby. He got to listen to me vent, and cry, and whine, for a good 90 minutes. It's just not FAIR, I whined. And whined some more. Oh, the drama of it all....

Poor Hubby.

Anyway. I got over it. I know I'll have some good days - and not so good days - on this new lifestyle. It's the nature of the beast, and it will definitely take some adjustment on my part, as well as those around me.

But...in the meantime...I really DO mourn the loss of the life - or food, anyway - that I used to know.

Peace.