Somebody, Please, Tell Me What Is Going On

See, I KNEW if I posted about the "routine-ness" of my days - that something would happen to bite me in the ass and send my life into a spiral of craziness.

Only, who knew it would be the health of my Dad that would bring this on??!!

My dad will turn 72 years old on Sunday…and although he's not in perfect health, he's managed to hang in there and stay somewhat healthy over the years. Until this Christmas, that is. Right before the holidays, he got very, very ill - chills, fever, nausea, vomiting, and bowel issues. After suffering for several days, he relented to being admitted to a hospital in Kansas City, where he was subjugated to a battery of tests. All of which revealed what was NOT wrong with him, but nothing that said what WAS wrong with him.

Don't you hate that? "Well, we can rule out this…we can rule out that…but we don't really know what it is."

Sigh.

And that's why we pay you the BIG bucks, doctors.

Anyway, he seemed to bounce back after a few days of fluids and antibiotics, so as soon as he was discharged, he and Mom hit the road and drove 1400 miles south to Ft. Myers, impatient to enjoy their brand-new (to them) condo for the winter. When I heard their plans, I was a bit skeptical - wondering if this was the smartest thing to do when one has been so sick - but did they listen to me?

Oh, heck no. Just like I pretty much never listened to them when they were giving ME advice over the years.

Karma.

So, of course, what happens when they take up residence as Snowbirds in the Sunshine State?

Dad gets sick again. Same symptoms. Only, worse. By Monday night, he was so violently ill, that he begged Mom to call an ambulance - which, if you know my Dad, was SO out of character. Upon admission, they found his blood pressure so low that it wouldn't even register on their measuring devices. Into the ICU he went…and when the doctor told mom that Dad's condition was "life-threatening", it was a no-brainer for my siblings and I to jump on a plane Tuesday and fly south to be with them.

They are "guessing" that he has C-diff, a highly contagious infection that can be life-threatening if not treated properly. But they're not positive. And we know that the doctors in Kansas City tested him not once, but TWICE, for C-diff, and ruled it out both times.

So we're at a loss.

Yesterday, Dad was pretty incoherent for most of the day. Today, he seemed to perk up a bit more, and was almost overwhelmed to see that his three kids had traveled 1400 miles to be with him. Tonight, however, he had relapsed a bit, so it seems to be a matter of day-to-day on how he's doing.

This is where it's frustrating…this not knowing…this guessing…this hopelessness and dependence on the knowledge of the doctors treating him. What is it? Why is this happening? How can we treat it? What does the future hold?

Gah.

Dammit. I want answers. I want it fixed. I want to know that when I go back home - and I need to go back home pretty soon, as I have responsibilities and such there that need to be taken care of - that Dad will be okay.

Sigh. We can't always get what we want (with homage to Mick Jagger and the Stones), and that is sometimes the hardest lesson in life of all.

Peace.