I Totally Screwed Up

As much as I love to travel, and as much as I love to go on mission trips, AND - as much as I love to escape the frozen, snowy, icy tundra of the midwest and head south this time of year -

I made a horrible, horrible, HUGE boo-boo when I signed on for this trip to Belize.

A mistake of epic proportions that can't be undone - that can't be fixed - and will forever live now, in my memory, as the year of the "What the hell was she thinking???!!!???!!" moment.

I know, I know - you all thought I was perfect. It's understandable. Most people do. I even get caught up in that belief every now and then - and then I am shamefully brought down to earth with a shattering thud when I realize I SCREWED UP. Big time.

"What is it?" you ask, in breathless wonder...."What can be so horrible about this trip? What did you screw up?"

Well, I'll tell you, Dear Readers. I hope you're sitting down. And aren't prone to heart attacks or anything. Because when you read this, the shock of it may send you into an immediate faint/coma - or to the nearest cardiac unit to get revived.

Are you ready?

Sure?

Okay....here goes....

....taking deep breath.....

I am going to miss the Super Bowl on Sunday.

Oh. My. God.

Seriously.

You're looking at one of the BIGGEST, most FANATICAL football fans in the country - who lives and dies for Sundays during football season -

- and I will be in a Belizan jungle on Sunday.

Oh. My. God.

I can set the DVR to record it - but...deep sigh....it's just not the same.

Sigh.

Peace.

My Brush with Hurricane Wilma

I'm heading to Belize on Saturday - another mission trip - only this time, working more in construction and with children. More up my ally.

The last time I was in Belize, Hurricane Wilma decided to join me. I didn't invite her - if anything, she was the LAST traveling partner I would have brought along. History says she was the most intense hurricane ever recorded in the Atlanta basin - and she did reach a Category 5. She was nasty.

It was in 2005 - and we were on a Western Caribbean cruise... We had spent the good part of the cruise about one day ahead of Hurricane Wilma - she was chasing us around, we were running full-steam ahead of her - dodging this way, feigning that way, doing our best to avoid her and her treacherous path - but when we reached Belize - she caught us.

Oh, it was a mess. Lots and lots of rain...cats and dogs, buckets, you name it - winds whipping at us - as we traversed the streets of Belize City in a little cab driven by a wonderful Belizan named Douglas. We had planned on going cave-tubing that day, but duh - all shore excursions were cancelled, due to Wilma. We survived a harrowing tender ride from the ship to the port, where Hubby turns to me, and asks,

"So - do you want to go snorkeling? I mean, I know it's raining and all - but we'd be wet anyway. We'll be in the water and we won't even notice the rain."

I looked at him like he'd just grown 4 heads....and said, "Uh yeah...but I WOULD notice the 6-foot swells out there! We're on the edge of a hurricane, dude! And I DON'T SWIM!!!"

Maybe he had ulterior motives...I suspect he had increased my life insurance or something before we left. Hmmm....

I'm not the smartest bulb in the bunch, but I DO know to not go snorkeling in a hurricane. (Well, the edge of a hurricane, anyway. We were "in the outer bands" at this point.)

Anyway, we DIDN'T snorkel - but we did opt to go on a little driving tour of the country - in the pouring rain, in the wind - and we had a great time that day with Douglas. Douglas made a drippy day very sunny for us with his obvious love for his country. He even proudly took us to his house that day.

Later that afternoon, we had another harrowing ride on the tender back to the ship - it was awful.

The next day, we learned that 7 people had died in Belize the day before - 2 people were killed in a small airplane crash at the airport, (trying to land in the winds), and 5 fishermen had died when their boat overturned at sea. And hubby had wanted to go snorkeling. Geesh.

I'm so glad it's not hurricane season now. Although rain is in the forecast for Belize next week, it can't be as bad as 2005. When Wilma tagged along with us the day we were in Belize. Bleh.

Peace.

Blog Fodder

Paranoia is running rampant through my family.

I first noticed it a few months back...strangely enough, right around the time I began this blog. Coincidence, you think?

When my daughter does something totally hilarious, (in my eyes, anyway), she immediately says to me, "I'm going on the blog, aren't I?"

When my husband does something totally stupid hilarious, he immediately says to me, "I'm screwed. This is so going on the blog, isn't it?!"

We now have a term for it in our house...it's called "blog fodder."

My husband received a wine "aerator" for Christmas. It's a little gadgety-gizmo thingy that he uses to pour his wine through to "enhance the flavor". The problem with it - as he pours the wine through, it makes all these terribly funny, gaseous-type noises... When he first did this, I didn't know if he was "aerating" himself or the wine...if you get my drift. I thought perhaps he'd had Mexican beans for lunch or something. So, the other night, I once again hear all of these funny, fart-sounding noises in the other room, and I holler, "You need to warn me when you're aerating!" And then, realizing what I'd just said, I clarified, "When you're aerating your wine, I mean...." He stepped into the room and rolls his eyes and shakes his head...so I added, for good measure, "Well - I guess you should warn me when you're aerating yourself, too. That WOULD be the polite thing to do, you know."

He looks at me again....blinks his eyes...and says, "You think this is so funny, don't you? This is blog fodder. That's all I am to you anymore - blog fodder."

This paranoia is now working to my advantage; I've discovered a great parenting tool in in.

When I want to warn the children about the perils of their ways - or if they're about to do something incredibly dumb or stupid - all I have to say is, "Watch out! If you do that - you'll be blog fodder!" Dun...Dun...DUNNNNN.....!

They'll look at me in horror - and then immediately cease and desist from whatever it was they were about to do. It's amazing.

Works on hubby, too. I just look at him and say, "I'm just warning you...blog fodder. That's all I'm going to say on this."

The problem is...I'm running out of stuff to post on my blog. Dammit. I need fodder.

Peace.

Cheesy Mac Flambe

Fabulous recipes...delectable dishes...epicurious epics of wonder...have you seen some of the blogs out there devoted to gastric delights that have amazing Julia Child-worthy recipes and Pulitzer Prize-worthy photos?

I love those blogs. I've salivated over some of the recipes I've seen...and I've always wanted to be able to post my own mouth-watering delicacy on my OWN blog...and yet, I've never really found the right recipe.

Until now.

Today, my 10-year old daughter came up with a version of macaroni and cheese that, when I saw it, I thought - this is it! Voila! THIS is what I have to share with everyone!

Yes, dear readers...may I give you: (drum roll, please)

Cheesy Mac Flambe

Notice how you don't even need a serving plate for this - it has melted to the lid. Convenient, eh?

This recipe is courtesy of my 10-year old daughter, who "discovered" this recipe by putting in a microwaveable bowl of macaroni & cheese - and neglected to add water...thereby almost, but not quite, insuring herself of burning our house down.

Oh my...the smells wafting through our house after THIS episode...you can only imagine... and the sights? Imagine smoke...lots of smoke...drifting and weaving its way around my kitchen and dining room for hours and hours upon end....

So - I think you got that recipe, right? Take one microwave serving of mac & cheese, DON'T add water, and zap it in the microwave.

And you, too, can have this amazing meal for breakfast.

Bon appetit!

P.S. Thanks to everyone for their thoughts and prayers for my health. I am happy to report that today, I felt 10x better. It is either due to the antibiotics FINALLY kicking in, or the fact that I switched from Tylenol to Aleve. (Yeah, Aleve - you can send me my endorsement check later. You're welcome.) If I keep making progress like this each day this week, I'll be good and ready to go to Belize.

Peace.

Same Old, Same Old

Wow.

Still sick. Now, I'm saying prayers it doesn't turn into bronchitis or pneumonia. Kinda' seems that is what it is trying to do. That would suck. I had pneumonia back in 1993 - and it was horrible. Took me forever to recover from it.

I leave this Saturday for an 8-day mission trip to Belize - and so I have to get better. Fast. No more pain & pressure; no more coughing; no more tightness in my chest. No more. Be gone, already. Please.

What's even worse - I had a huge "to-do" list that I wanted to accomplish before I went out of town - all of those "Mom" things and errands that would leave my household all nice and organized while I was gone. Well - it ain't happening. Nothing much is happening except for me, lying here in bed, surrounded by Kleenex and medication and fluids. I'm trying to drink lots of fluids. I'm trying to get lots of rest. I'm trying to do all of the right things.

So - I apologize my blog seems to have "fixated" on being sick - I guess since I've done nothing but spend the last 5-6 days in bed, my life is pretty dull right now. I have this HUGE adventure coming up in a few days - but if I don't get better - I don't get to go. Argh.

Well - one more day; one more day of being miserable. Here's hoping tomorrow is another day and I'll be on the mend. In the meantime, everyone - take care. :)