Tuesday, March 9, 2010

The Monster Under My Bed

The saga of the Sleep Number bed continues...

If you remember our story, our new bed was delivered Friday afternoon...per instructions from our salesman, we set the initial number to "55" - and were told to leave it that way for four days before beginning to adjust it to our taste.

I was in a deep, deep sleep last night when I began hearing thumping...and rattling..under my bed.....whah??

I awoke at 2:00 a.m. to find my dear, dear hubby UNDER our bed - muttering and cursing....

"What the HELL are you doing under there? And waking me up at 2:00 a.m.???" I shrieked. I was a little pissed because I had first mistaken him for a mad serial killer or a monster - I mean, who else would be under a bed at 2:00 a.m. except someone who is up to no good??!!

"My bed is like a ROCK! And I can't get it to change! I'm looking to see if something is unplugged or something!!!" He muttered.

"Give me the damn remote," I said. Sorry about the cursing - you'd curse, too, if you'd been so rudely awakened. Argh.

I get the remote and push the buttons - and sure enough, nada. The digital readout says, "ER" - which could mean either that my hubby was one punch away from the Emergency Room, or "Error". I guess I'll go with "Error". Whatever it meant, it wasn't doing a thing - the bed just sat there...not inflating or deflating. Stuck.

"Well, get back up here and suck it up. We're not going to fix it at 2:00 a.m." I was feeling less than friendly at this point.

Hubby grudgingly gives up trying to fix the bed - in the dark - and climbs back in - and immediately falls back to sleep. Me? I laid there - tossed and turned - until 2:45 a.m. I was close to turning into a mad killer myself - hubby was lucky he was alive this morning.

And strangely enough, this week is National Sleep Awareness Week. Seriously. And I was very aware that it is next to impossible to sleep when your hubby is under your bed at 2:00 a.m. in the morning, banging and rattling things around, trying to fix the bed. I could tell you what the fix for that is, but it's probably not printable.

Now - I must go. I have a freakin' bed to fix.




Jenny said...

How hilarious! Totally funny. Thank goodness your husband and I aren't married. We would never get any sleep. I mean...ummm.... well.... OK, just never mind. Bye.

Ellen said...

You are hilarious! I have had the same experience about hubby waking me up then going right back to sleep and there I lay! More than once. I start moving around, turning over with a thud, moaning. I do it all but he just sleeps through it. I guess that's the price we pay for being such "sweet, wonderful, loving" wives. Good luck getting the bed situation figured out. My friend got one of those beds and LOVES it. She says she has found paradise.